Remember and Wonder
*This is the only "studio" picture I can ever remember seeing of my Grandma. I can’t really remember the last time I felt that way, but it was a feeling that snuck up on me this afternoon. Quietly, briefly, like a whisper in a crowded room from a familiar voice you thought was long dead. It wasn’t anything particularly notable. I was just lying on the couch, under a light blanket, under the ceiling fan, the blinds open with the afternoon sun struggling to break through the summer thundershower threatening to wet the hot concrete on the driveway. I don’t know what triggered it. Maybe it was the temperature, the particular way the couch pushed back against me, the right amount of sunlight, the time of day…but it hit me, that feeling I haven’t felt in so long, a feeling that seemed to belong to another person, in another time. There’s no real word for it. I’m not even sure if I can say it’s a universal feeling, but as I was lying on that couch I was suddenly, p